Preserving the Will to Live

As I retire Cindy’s worn out pants I have a difficult decision to make. Do I get a replacement pair? Three years ago when my daughters bought these pants and two others the decision was easier. Based on her rate of decline she still had months left, maybe even a couple years. Now I am faced with the same decision, more than a couple years later. Had I known I would not have requested the cheapest pair of pants my daughters could find.

We are approaching two years since I first started formulating plans for Cindy’s memorial service. We are approaching two years since she last could walk on her own. The one function Cindy still does well is swallow, a very important function, but the only one she can do. Otherwise, her physical decline is complete. Add to that the articles I read that early onset patients decline faster and I do not blame myself for working on her memorial service prematurely, but I know now that physical decline is not the key.

The key to longevity for a person in Cindy’s situation is the will to live.

What has maintained Cindy’s will to live despite her tragic condition? My love obviously plays an important part; I’m not just referring to the quality time we have in a pedicab and other endeavors. Quantity time counts at least as much as quality time in conveying love, particularly if you want a person with severe cognitive decline to remember you.

We also have been observers of the SPA Treatment (being social, positive, active), which not only mitigates cognitive decline (in my case), but enhances the will to live. Looking at this another way, being isolated, negative or sedentary will decrease one’s will to live and longevity, whether they have dementia or not. Our own approach to the SPA Treatment includes a pedicab and other strategies unique to our situation; other situation calls for other SPA strategies.

I also use strategies increasing the will to live that apply to anyone. I plan to cover three categories of such strategies that may help you with an incapacitated loved one. Stay tuned for these in future blog posts.